“Verso l’alto!” (“Toward the Heights!”)

“You ask me whether I am in good spirits. How could I not be so? As long as Faith gives me strength I will always be joyful!” – Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati

By Amy Morin (Psychotherapist and author):

As the author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, I usually spend my time talking about the bad habits that can rob you of mental strength. After all, it only takes one bad habit to hold you back from reaching your greatest potential.

In addition to giving up those bad habits, however, it’s also important to perform exercises that build your mental muscle. With hard work and dedication, you can train your brain to perform at your peak.

Here are 18 things mentally strong people do.

1. They practice gratitude.
Counting their blessings, rather than their burdens, helps mentally strong people keep life in proper perspective. Their choice to be grateful shines through in their mood and behavior.

2. They retain their personal power.
Mentally strong people don’t give negative people power over them. They refuse to blame anyone for holding them back or dragging them down.

3. They accept challenges.
Mentally strong people view adversity as an opportunity to grow stronger. With each obstacle they overcome, they gain confidence in their ability to become better.

4. They focus on the things they can control.
Mentally strong people stay productive and effective by focusing on the things they have control over. Rather than waste energy worrying about whether the storm will come, they invest their efforts into preparing for it the best they can.

5. They set healthy boundaries.
Creating healthy emotional and physical boundaries gives mentally strong people the room they need to grow. Even when they may disappoint others, they’re willing to say no.

6. They take calculated risks.
Mentally strong people balance their emotions with logic so they can calculate each risk they face. They’re willing to step outside their comfort zone and seek opportunities that will help them reach their goals.

7. They make peace with the past.
Mentally strong people reflect on the past so they can learn from it, but they don’t dwell on it. They refuse to live a life of regret and they let go of grudges.

8. They learn from their mistakes.
Rather than beat themselves up for their mistakes, mentally strong people focus on learning from them. They accept full responsibility for their behavior and choose to move forward in a productive manner.

9. They create their own definition of success.
Rather than resent other’s good fortune, mentally strong people feel free to share in their joy. They recognize that other people’s achievements don’t diminish their own.

10. They view failure as an opportunity for growth.
Failure is often part of any long journey toward success. Mentally strong people accept that and they choose to use each failure as an opportunity to grow wiser.

11. They set aside time to be alone.
Mentally strong people take time to be alone with their thoughts. Whether they write in a journal, practice meditation, or sit silently and reflect, they know a little solitude is essential to their well-being.

12. They accept full responsibility for their lives.
Mentally strong people create opportunities for themselves. They don’t waste time waiting for the world to give them what they think they’re owed.

13. They practice perseverance.
Mentally strong people know that the best things in life are worth waiting for. They exercise patience and persistence as they strive for their goals.

14. They modify their unhealthy beliefs.
Mentally strong people refuse to allow self-limiting beliefs to restrict their potential. They understand their minds can be their best asset or their worst enemy.

15. They expend their mental energy wisely.
Instead of complaining about things they can’t change or rehashing something that happened yesterday, mentally strong people devote their energy to productive tasks. They don’t waste limited resources, like time and energy, on things that aren’t helpful.

16. They practice realistic optimism.
Mentally strong people talk to themselves like a trusted coach. They refuse to believe pessimistic predictions but they also don’t allow themselves to become overconfident.

17. They tolerate discomfort.
Mentally strong people aren’t afraid to endure a little pain. Whether they keep running when their legs are tired or they resist instant gratification, they practice self-discipline even when it’s uncomfortable.

18. They stay true to their values.
Mentally strong people keep their priorities in line with their beliefs. They’re courageous enough to live according to their values, even when it’s not the popular choice.

 

Mentally strong people have healthy habits. They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in ways that set them up for success in life. Check out these things that mentally strong people don’t do so that you too can become more mentally strong:

1. They Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves
Mentally strong people don’t sit around feeling sorry about their circumstances or how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life isn’t always easy or fair.

2. They Don’t Give Away Their Power
They don’t allow others to control them, and they don’t give someone else power over them. They don’t say things like, “My boss makes me feel bad,” because they understand that they are in control over their own emotions and they have a choice in how they respond.

3. They Don’t Shy Away from Change
Mentally strong people don’t try to avoid change. Instead, they welcome positive change and are willing to be flexible. They understand that change is inevitable and believe in their abilities to adapt.

4. They Don’t Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control
You won’t hear a mentally strong person complaining over lost luggage or traffic jams. Instead, they focus on what they can control in their lives. They recognize that sometimes, the only thing they can control is their attitude.

5. They Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone
Mentally strong people recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary. They strive to be kind and fair, but can handle other people being upset if they didn’t make them happy.

6. They Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks
They don’t take reckless or foolish risks, but don’t mind taking calculated risks. Mentally strong people spend time weighing the risks and benefits before making a big decision, and they’re fully informed of the potential downsides before they take action.

7. They Don’t Dwell on the Past
Mentally strong people don’t waste time dwelling on the past and wishing things could be different. They acknowledge their past and can say what they’ve learned from it. However, they don’t constantly relive bad experiences or fantasize about the glory days. Instead, they live for the present and plan for the future.

8. They Don’t Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over
Mentally strong people accept responsibility for their behavior and learn from their past mistakes. As a result, they don’t keep repeating those mistakes over and over. Instead, they move on and make better decisions in the future.

9. They Don’t Resent Other People’s Success
Mentally strong people can appreciate and celebrate other people’s success in life. They don’t grow jealous or feel cheated when others surpass them. Instead, they recognize that success comes with hard work, and they are willing to work hard for their own chance at success.

10. They Don’t Give Up After the First Failure
Mentally strong people don’t view failure as a reason to give up. Instead, they use failure as an opportunity to grow and improve. They are willing to keep trying until they get it right.

11. They Don’t Fear Alone Time
Mentally strong people can tolerate being alone and they don’t fear silence. They aren’t afraid to be alone with their thoughts and they can use downtime to be productive. They enjoy their own company and aren’t dependent on others for companionship and entertainment all the time but instead can be happy alone.

12. They Don’t Feel the World Owes Them Anything
Mentally strong people don’t feel entitled to things in life. They weren’t born with a mentality that others would take care of them or that the world must give them something. Instead, they look for opportunities based on their own merits.

13. They Don’t Expect Immediate Results
Whether they are working on improving their health or getting a new business off the ground, mentally strong people don’t expect immediate results. Instead, they apply their skills and time to the best of their ability and understand that real change takes time.